Another See-crud

For the third time in as many minutes, Trixie let out a long sigh.  Sitting across from her at the restaurant table, Mrs. Belden silently sighed to herself.  Trixie had been almost unbearable since Jim had left the previous evening to go back to college after the winter break.  She wondered if Honey was as melodramatic with Brian gone.

“Trixie, you just saw Jim yesterday and he'll be back this weekend, I think you can manage to live without him for a couple of days, sweetie.”

“I know, Moms, and I can live without him. I just miss seeing him every day.” And every evening, Trixie thought, I especially miss the evenings.

    “Well, you know what they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder, Trixie.  A little separation is good for you.”

    Trixie rolled her eyes as she reached for another french fry.

    “Besides, Trixie, sometimes I think you two spend a bit too much time together.  You are still rather young, and you don’t want to rush into anything.”

    “Moms!  We’re not rushing into anything.  Besides, we waited the longest out of the Bob-White couples to start dating.  And we’re taking things slowly.” 

    “Well, you’re trying to take things slowly.  Don’t try and interrupt, Trixie, I was young once too, you know.  And I know how easy it is for things to get out of control. In fact, that’s what today is about.”

    “Moms, Jim is too honorable to…what do you mean that’s what today is about?”

    Mrs. Belden had requested, no, demanded Trixie’s time that day.  She had announced that it was past time for a mother-daughter outing and decreed that she and Trixie would be spending Martin Luther King Day together shopping in White Plains alone.  Trixie had protested for a while, hoping to spend some time with Honey, but Mrs. Belden had put her foot down.  Before shopping, they had stopped to eat lunch at the mall.

    “I figure it’s time for some serious discussions.  After all, I know that Jim is honorable…but I also know he’s a male.  And there will be a time when honor might not be controlling his emotions…or his body,” Mrs. Belden said with a smile.

    Trixie blushed.  “Mother! I can’t believe you just said that…I mean, Jim hasn’t, I mean, Jim wouldn’t do anything.”

    Mrs. Belden sniffed. “Well, you two have only been dating for what, three months now?”

    “Three months tomorrow,” Trixie said proudly.

    “Then I certainly hope he hasn’t done much.  After all, right now he should still be afraid of what your father will do if he goes too far.”

    “Yes, he is worried about Dad.  I think he’s also worried that’s why Dad signed me up for martial arts training.”  Trixie laughed as she remembered the look on Jim’s face when the Bob-White parents and guardians had presented her, Honey, Diana, Mart, and Dan with a year’s worth of martial arts lessons for Christmas.  Mr. Hartman, a neighbor and former police officer, would be instructing the friends in ways to protect themselves. 

    Mrs. Belden laughed, “I don’t think your Dad had that in mind when he signed you up, but I wouldn’t put anything past him.  But seriously, Trixie, there’s one more thing I’d like to do today.”

    Removing the straw from her mouth, “What’s that, Moms?” 

    “Look, your father and I have different methods of protecting our children sometimes.  Your dad is hoping the intimidation factor will work on Jim so that the two of you don’t go too far too soon.  But I’m a bit more practical than your father.  So just in case the fear factor doesn’t work, I’d like for you to be prepared.”

    Trixie widened her eyes at her mother.  “What do mean, be prepared?”

    “I’ve made you an appointment at the gynecologist.”

    Trixie had made the mistake of drinking her soda again after she had asked her question, and once she finished choking, she cried out, “What?  You can’t be serious.”

    “I am completely serious, Beatrix.”

    “But we haven’t, we aren’t, we haven’t even talked having s– doing that yet.”

    “Not yet, Trixie, but trust me, there will be a time when Jim will be struggling with temptation, as will you.  And although I’d really, really prefer if the two of you waited until you were married, I’m realistic enough to realize how unlikely that is.  After all, I suspect that you’re not planning on getting married until after college, right?”

    Trixie nodded slowly.  “Not that we’ve talked about that either, but I definitely think we’d wait until at least graduation, maybe even until we’ve both started our careers.  But just cause we might not wait until we’re married, doesn’t mean we’re going to be having…sex now.” 

    “I know, but I still want you to be prepared in case something happens that neither of you expect. That’s why I think it would be good to get you started on birth control pills. It is your decision, but I think it’s a good idea.”

    Trixie looked in shock at her mother.

    Mrs. Belden sighed, “Look, you’re a smart girl, so I assume you’ve done the math and figured out that your father and I didn’t actually plan to have Brian when we did.”

    Squirming a bit in her seat, Trixie grimaced, “Yeah, I figured it out a number of years back.  Is that– is that why you and Dad got married?”

    “That’s not WHY we got married, Trixie, but it definitely influenced WHEN we got married.  We had plans to marry after we both finished college, but getting pregnant changed that timeline.  And I don’t want that to happen to you.” 

    Mrs. Belden looked at Trixie and realized how uncomfortable she was.  Deciding to lighten the mood a bit, she patted her curls and said, “Besides, I’m way too young and beautiful to be a grandmother.”

    Trixie laughed.  “That you are, Moms.”  She paused as she realized something, “And now you have three children to worry about…not that I think Brian or Mart are doing that either.” She rushed to finish.

    “I hope not, Trixie.  And besides, trust me that you aren’t the only daughter to be having this conversation with her mother.”

    “Really? I can’t even picture Mrs. Wheeler talking to Honey about something like this.”

    Mrs. Belden shrugged, not offering any comment.

    “Does Dad know?”

    “Of course.  Your father and I discussed it. I don’t keep secrets from my husband…well, not on anything this important.”

    “I can’t believe Daddy is going along with this idea.”

    Mrs. Belden sniffed. “Well, I can’t say he’s terribly happy with the idea, in fact, we had a good argument about it.  But eventually he went along with it, on one condition.”

    “What condition is that?”  Trixie blushed at the thought of her parents discussing her relationship with Jim. 

    “We – both of us – think it’s best if you don’t mention anything to Jim about you going on the pill.”

    “Wait, I thought that you’re not supposed to keep secrets,” Trixie reminded her mother.

    “That’s between a husband and a wife, Trixie.  And we’ve already established you and Jim aren’t there yet.  Besides, I’m not suggesting that you lie to Jim.   I just don’t think you should go running to him about it.”

    “Why is that, Moms?”

    Mrs. Belden paused as the waitress came over to clear the table.  Mrs. Belden had already stacked the plates and bowls together and quickly passed their dishes to the waitress as she asked for the check.

    “Well, right now, Jim is thinking about your father’s threats and, to give him credit, I’m sure Jim also wants to respect you.  But eventually his…desires may outweigh those concerns and he’s going to be tempted.  So we’d prefer if he’d also have the additional concern about pregnancy.”

    “Moms, I can’t believe you think Jim’s going actually try and do anything.  He’s promised to take things as slowly as I want.”

    “Yes, Trixie, but another way to put that is that he’s agreed to take things as quickly as you’re comfortable with.  Look, trust me on this, Trixie.  Jim is a wonderful boy…I mean, a wonderful man.  And I know that he will do everything possible to try and control himself.  But hormones are powerful things for both men and women.  And anything that you can use to counteract them is a good thing.  There will be a time when you won’t particularly want to take things slowly either.  Can you honestly tell me that you haven’t thought of sex?  Or that Jim hasn’t had any difficulty controlling himself?”

    Trixie blushed as she remembered the night when Jim came home for Christmas break in the wee hours of the morning.  She had been spending the night with Honey and had discovered Jim returning home from college early. She was still surprised by his comments that night.  He had admitted that he was having difficulty controlling himself with her in his bedroom.

“But Jim, I’m wearing flannel pajamas for God’s sake. You can NOT be turned on by that."

"Really?" Jim raised an eyebrow. "And what exactly are you wearing under those pajamas?"

For possibly the first time in her life, Trixie was momentarily speechless. "Umm…ummm…nothing," she finally stammered.

Jim groaned. "Trixie, you weren’t supposed to answer that. I mean, I knew that, but you weren’t supposed to acknowledge it." He turned around to finish unpacking.

"But Jim, they’re flannel pajamas...with baby blue flowers on them."

Jim turned around again and put his hands on his hips. "Yeah, and exactly how long do you think it would take for me to remove said pajamas?"

    She had realized at that point that maybe Mr. Honorable might be human after all.  And since then, she had noticed that whenever they managed to find time alone together, Jim did his best to keep a tight rein on his emotions.

    Trixie looked up and realized that her mother was eyeballing her.  She blushed again.  She had never been good at hiding anything from her mother, and it looked like she wasn’t going to be able to hide these types of things either.

    “I think I’ve made my point, Trixie.  I won’t make you explain the blush.  Anyway, I also want to make sure you realize that although I’m suggesting that you go on the pill, this does NOT mean I am encouraging you to have sex.  I’m just being careful.  I wouldn’t want you to go skydiving either, but if you did, I’d want you to have a parachute.”

    “I understand, Moms.  And I guess you have a good point, maybe it’s not a bad idea to have a back-up plan. But really, Jim and I want to wait…maybe not until marriage, but not any time soon either.”

    “Have you two talked about sex at all?”  Mrs. Belden asked as she left money for the waitress.  Standing up, she grabbed her coat and pocketbook.

    “Well, not really.  Just talked a bit about how embarrassing Dad was.  And Jim promised that he would respect me.”

    “I’m sure he’ll do his best, Trixie.  But trust me, sweetie, there will be times when it’s going to be hard for both of you to resist.  In fact, that’ll probably be the worst thing for Jim.  He’s never been very good at telling you no, so if you start wanting it….”

    “MOTHER!  We’ve just started dating,” Trixie burst out.

    Mrs. Belden rolled her eyes.  “I know, daughter.  But trust your mother on this one, eventually, you’ll be tempted.  And although I trust you…and Jim, to make the right choice, why don’t we just get a bit of insurance that wrong choices don’t end up with some life-altering results?”


    Trixie had thought that nothing could be more embarrassing than that discussion with her mother, but her appointment with the gynecologist took embarrassment to a whole new level.  Although Dr. Hoffman (who was thankfully a female) was very nice and gentle, the initial questioning was awkward to say the least, and Trixie was very, very uncomfortable during the poking and prodding part.  At least Mrs. Belden had chosen to wait in the lobby for Trixie.

    In spite of her discomfort, Trixie managed to make it through the appointment.  She and her mother dropped off the prescription for birth control pills and headed out for ice cream while they waited for the order to be filled.

    “OK, Moms, since I’ve just been through an embarrassing experience following an embarrassing and personal conversation, there’s something I want to know.”

    Mrs. Belden steeled herself for the worst and answered, “Well, as long as it’s not something too personal or inappropriate for sharing, I’ll answer you.”

    “Remember the night that Jim and I told you and Dad about the plan to keep our relationship secret?”

    Mrs. Belden nodded.

    “Well, Dad said something about Aunt Alicia having been the bad one at interfering.  But then he refused to tell the story.”

    Mrs. Belden started laughing. “Oh, now that’s definitely an embarrassing story.  And your father will probably kill me for telling you, but considering he’s not happy about anything I’m doing today, here goes.  Basically, when we were dating, we found it rather difficult to get any privacy.”

    Trixie snorted, “Yeah, I know how that feels.”

    Mrs. Belden smiled, “Yes, you and I have similarly protective fathers.  Well, your father and I managed to find a place in Sleepyside where we could be…alone.  We’d often go there on our dates. Don’t even think about asking where, Trixie, I can see it on your face.  After all, would you really want to know where your father and I went for some private time?  Then you’d think about it whenever you were there.”

    Trixie scrunched up her face, “That’s a good point…wait, does this mean it’s somewhere that I go?  Wait, don’t answer that.”

    “I won’t.  Anyway, Alicia managed to figure out where we went, I think she must have followed us or something.  So, after watching us make out one evening, she planned a little surprise for us the following night,” Mrs. Belden started giggling.

    With some difficulty, she continued, “So, the next night *snort*, in the middle of some serious kissing *giggle* ” Mrs. Belden stopped, unable to go on.  She wiped her eyes and tried to gather some control over her laughter.  She turned a little pink as she realized everyone in the ice cream parlor was staring at her.

    Trixie sighed, witnessing a familiar routine.  She was used to this, her mother had never been able to tell a joke.  She would inevitably end up giggling her way right though the punchline.  She and her brothers agreed that the method of storytelling was far funnier than any of the jokes she told.

    After a bit more giggling and a sip of her drink, Mrs. Belden continued, “Anyway, in the middle of this, Peter yells and jumps up.  Evidently, Alicia had rigged up a water trap for us.  She had set up this huge bucket of water and watched and waited until the perfect moment. Then she pulled the rope and the water went crashing down on both of us.  Thankfully your father was hit by most of the water and I barely noticed anything until he yelled.  Oh, he was so drenched.”  At this, both of the women burst into laughter, one at the memory and one at the shock that Aunt Alicia ever played a joke like that.  Perhaps Trixie should get to know her a bit better, after all.

    “Alicia then yells, ‘I figured you two needed to cool off’ and took off through the Preserve with Peter hot on her heels.  But he never caught her and of course he couldn’t tell my father what she had done or he would have to explain where we were and what we were doing.”

    Trixie laughed and tried to ignore the fact that her mother had given her a clue mentioning the Preserve.  It made sense though, her father had grown up in those woods too and there were plenty of abandoned buildings there.  But she really, really didn’t want to think about it.  Just like she didn’t want to think why it was that her father had managed to be the only one that was really drenched by the water.

    After a few more moments of laughter, Mrs. Belden got serious again. 

    “Again, Trixie, I want once again to reiterate that although I’m recommending birth control for you, that doesn’t mean I approve of you and Jim having sex.  I really do think you should wait.”

    “Moms, we’re planning on waiting, for a while at least.”
   
    “Really? Because you said earlier that you and Jim hadn’t even talked about sex.  How can you then say that you’ve got a plan?”

    “Well, we haven’t talked about it.  But we haven’t talked about doing it either.”

    “Trust me, Trixie, not talking about it does not guarantee that you won’t do anything. In fact, it’s probably the opposite case.  It just means you won’t be prepared if something does happen.  Again, that’s why I wanted to just make sure that you were prepared, at least.  But once you make a decision to have sex, you should still use a condom as well. After all, birth control pills aren’t 100% reliable, and they don’t protect against STD’s.”

    Trixie rolled her eyes.  “Moms, I just took Sex Ed last semester, I know all about reliability and STD’s.”

    “Of course, dear, and you think you know everything there is to know about sex. But I also wanted to talk to you about the emotional side, not the physical one.  I’m talking about the reasons to have sex, or not to have sex.  There are a lot of women – and men –who have sex for the wrong reasons.”

    Trixie looked curiously at her mother.  “Like what?”

    “Some women have sex because their friends are doing it and they don’t want to be different.  Others have sex out of curiosity.   And, a lot of women have sex in an effort to get – or keep – a man.  Maybe they think that’s all they have to offer the man, or maybe they think that’s the only way they can keep him and are afraid to live without him, so they take steps they aren’t ready for just to make sure they aren’t alone.  But you’re worth so much more than that, Trixie.  I don’t want you to fall into that trap.”

    Trixie looked at her mother, “That’s–that’s not why you and Dad had sex, is it?”

    Mrs. Belden shook her head emphatically, “No, Trixie.  I’d like to think that your father and I had sex for the right reasons, just not with the right protection.”

    “So what are the right reasons?”

     “Well, honestly, Trixie, you can only determine that for yourself.  But I’d say that the right reasons are that you honestly love this person.  So you’ve decided that you want to share a very personal part of yourself.  But really, it’s something that you have to know and feel comfortable with.”

    “So do you think I should actually talk to Jim about sex?”  Once again, Trixie squirmed in her chair.
   
    “At the very least, you should probably lay out some boundaries, Trixie.  Like what you feel comfortable with, what you don’t.  Maybe even decide when it would or would not be appropriate.  Obviously, before you turn 17 would not be appropriate.”

    “No, Daddy has already made that clear.  Do you think he’d really prosecute Jim?”

    “I don’t really know.  I doubt it, but he’ll sure as hell try to convince Jim that he will.”

    “Well, we’ll definitely wait until I’m 17.  Probably even wait until I’m 18 and legally an adult.  I bet Jim isn’t even thinking about having sex until I’m that old.”

    Mrs. Belden smiled.  “Oh, I’m sure Jim is thinking about sex, Trixie.  He’s 18 years old.  But yes, I hope he is planning on waiting. After all, he waited until you turned 16 before dating, so I’m sure that he’ll wait…”

    “What?  What do you mean he waited until I was 16?”

    “Trixie, you know that your father told Jim that you were too young to go steady.  They had a talk after Jim gave you the bracelet.”  Mrs. Belden continued when she realized Trixie looked surprised.  “You didn’t know that?”

    “NO!  No one ever told me that.  Is THAT why Jim never did anything after he gave me the bracelet?”

    “You mean, your father never talked to you about this?  I am going to kill that man.”

    Trixie shook her head violently, “No, neither of them did.  I just assumed Jim changed his mind about liking me or something.  That’s why I never believed everyone when they kept insisting he was attracted to me.”

    “I am definitely going to kill your father.  Trixie, after you got back from Iowa, your father saw the bracelet and had a nice ‘talk’ with Jim.  He told him that you were too young to go steady and asked him to wait until you were 16.  If I had known that your father didn’t talk to you about this, I would have definitely discussed it with you.  Trixie, Jim has always been attracted to you. You are a very attractive young lady.”

    Trixie blushed, “Thanks, Moms, but Di and Honey are…”

    “Stop comparing yourself to them, Trixie. Yes, they are beautiful, but so are you.”

    Trixie looked dubious.

    “OK, Trixie, do you think I’m beautiful?”

    “Oh, God, of course I do, Moms.  Everybody does.”

    “And you look just like me, Beatrix.  So why would you think that you’re not beautiful?” 

    “Well, I don’t look exactly like you do…I’m not as skinny and I’ve got freckles and…”

    “Trix–ie.” Mrs. Belden.  “First of all, you’ve lost weight since you were younger. And second, the freckles are endearing.  They’re cute.”

    “I know, Moms, but it stinks being ‘cute’ all the time.  Honey and Diana are sexy, I’m cute.”

    “Oh, you can be sexy too, Trixie.  Don’t underestimate your power.”  Mrs. Belden checked her watch.  “OK, the prescription should be ready, so let’s grab that and then go get some clothes.  And not the frumpy stuff you usually wear, we’re going to get some more flattering clothes. ”

    With that, she energetically threw her trash away, grabbed Trixie’s hand and marched her out the door.  She finally understood why her daughter had such little confidence in her looks and she was going to start remedying that right now. And then she was going to have a nice, long chat with her husband.

    First, they picked up the prescription from the pharmacy, which Trixie quickly hid in her purse.  Afterwards, they went shopping and Mrs. Belden talked Trixie into trying more form-fitting clothes, steering her clear of the bulky, two sizes-too large clothes Trixie often wore.

    “See, Trixie.  You have a nice body, you need to stop hiding it so much.”

    “Yeah, I guess you’re right.  I can’t believe how good some of these outfits looked.  Daddy’s going to have a heart attack.”

    “That’s only IF he lives to see them, Trixie.  I still can’t believe that he didn’t tell you that he had spoken to Jim.”

    “Well, I can’t believe JIM didn’t say anything to me about it.”  Trixie had been also doing some brooding about that herself.   “Moms, can I borrow the car tonight?  I would like to have an interesting conversation with one James Winthrop Frayne the Second.  He better be glad those martial arts classes haven’t started yet.”

    “That’s a long way to drive tonight, sweetie.  It can’t wait until this weekend?”

    “No. He should have told me…or Dad should have told me. No, Jim should have told me.  I can’t believe that he didn’t.”

    “I think your father should have told you, but I can understand why you are upset at Jim.  OK, Trixie, I will let you take the car.  In fact, why don’t you wear one of your new outfits up there?”